[Captured from Kim Jeong-hwa's YouTube channel]
[Captured from Kim Jeong-hwa's YouTube channel]

Actor Kim Jeong-hwa has spoken candidly about why she abruptly stepped away from the entertainment industry at the height of her career.

A video titled "The reason I gave up everything and suddenly disappeared" was posted Sunday on Kim's YouTube channel. Kim appeared alongside her husband, Yoo Eun-sung, and spoke about her life, faith and time in the entertainment industry.

Reflecting on her glamorous 20s, when she was at the peak of her fame, Kim said she had "paid tuition in time."

She said the decisive reason she stepped back from everything during her busiest period was her health. "I was a bit sick," she said. "I had the thought that if I kept going like this, I might really start having very dark thoughts — so I quit everything."

"That was when I was doing the best," Kim said. "I was working so much. Letting go of it all was honestly not easy."

Her agency at the time also wanted her to continue, but her mind was made up.

"The company kept talking to me about it, but I said, 'No. I feel like I'm going to die doing this, so I don't think I can,'" she said, adding that she ultimately decided to stop.

Kim also said that who she appeared to be on the outside was completely at odds with how she felt inside.

"Before that, everyone could see I was glamorous, looking great, seemingly at the top — but I was dying inside," she said.

"Other people were saying, 'Kim Jeong-hwa is gone now,' 'She just disappeared,' but for me, that was when I had the experience of coming back to life," she added.

Kim then began studying the Bible.

"That was the first time I really read the Bible properly," she said. "The stories in it felt so mysterious, interesting and something I could believe in with gratitude." She went on to say, "What all people of faith talk about — 'the world looks different' — I experienced that then. As I studied the Bible, my life started to come alive again."

Volunteer work in Africa also became a turning point that changed the way she saw her own life, she said.

Through that work, Kim formed a bond with Agnes, a child living with HIV. Going through a difficult period at the time, she said the experience in Africa made her reconsider things she had taken for granted.

"I was born in South Korea, born into a home where I could eat and live, I could study, and I happened to debut and things went well. Until then, I thought that was all just normal," she said. "After going to Africa, I realized not a single thing was to be taken for granted."

Kim also said she had struggled in the past by comparing herself to others in the industry, but her thinking changed after the Africa trip.

"In the past I used to think, 'Why am I doing worse than that person?' or 'Why can't I be the lead in a drama series?' But afterward I thought, 'I'm so grateful just to have supporting roles,' 'I'm so grateful just to have somewhere I can act.' Everything turned into gratitude, and I think that became the turning point that helped me gradually come out of depression," she said.

Kim made her entertainment debut in 2000 through singer Lee Seung-hwan's music video "Geudaega Geudaereul."

She went on to build a following as a youth star, appearing in a range of projects including the MBC sitcom "Nonstop," as well as "Into the Sun" and "Snow White."

She married Christian contemporary music singer and composer Yoo Eun-sung in 2013, and the couple have two sons.


yeonjoo7@heraldcorp.com