[123RF]
[123RF]

A woman who forgave her husband's affair and secured his promise never to see the other woman again discovered he had resumed the relationship — only to have him refuse a divorce on the grounds that she had already pardoned him once.

The story of the woman, identified only as A, who has been married for 15 years, was featured Thursday on YTN Radio's legal advice program "Jo In-seop's Counseling Office."

A said physical affection between the couple had gradually faded. "I thought it might just be a rough patch, but everyone said that is how married life goes, so I decided to focus on my role rather than expect excitement," she said.

She later discovered her husband was having an affair with a woman who worked at one of his company's client firms, and resolved to divorce him.

Her husband begged for another chance, saying, "Please think of the children and give me one more opportunity," and promised never to see the woman again.

The other woman also apologized to A and promised to cut off all contact with the husband.

Fearing what it would mean to end a 15-year marriage while her children were still young, A chose to forgive him.

Less than a year later, however, she found out that her husband had never stopped seeing the other woman.

When A again demanded a divorce, her husband refused, arguing, "You already forgave me before, so you cannot use this as grounds for divorce."

Attorney Lim Hyeong-chang addressed the case, saying that forgiving a past act of infidelity means only that — forgiving what had already happened up to that point. "It does not mean that future acts of infidelity are acceptable," he said.

Lim added that if the husband had promised never to meet the woman again and the couple had reconciled, any subsequent infidelity could constitute new grounds for divorce. "The fact that he was given a chance to rebuild trust and then repeated the same behavior would actually weigh heavily against him when a court assesses responsibility for the breakdown of the marriage," he said.

On the question of the other woman, Lim advised that if she had resumed the relationship after promising to end it, A could consider filing a claim for consolation damages against her.

However, he added that infidelity and the division of marital assets are separate matters.

"Each spouse's contribution to the marital estate must be assessed independently," Lim said. "If the husband spent a significant portion of the couple's shared assets on the affair — buying expensive gifts or covering the other woman's living expenses — that spending could be challenged as an unauthorized disposal of marital property."

He also advised A to gather not only evidence of the affair itself but also records of any money transfers the husband made to the other woman, gift purchases and travel expenses.


yeonjoo7@heraldcorp.com